Horrible Horror #21 - Black Christmas (2006)

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays, guys!

Yes, I am FINALLY back after a lot of schoolwork... and a little surprise that you will see at the beginning of this video. I do, however, apologize for the less than amazing sound. THere is an explanation of why it is that way in the end credits, but you might want to turn your speakers up a bit.

This thing has had it coming for a LONG time. Two years ago, when this show was new, I half ran out of time, half found myself so incredibly pissed that I couldn't write a coherent sentence about this piece of shit. And last year, I planned to make it along with Silent Night, Deadly Night 2, but ran out of time. But now it finally gets the beating it deserves - and just in time for you to watch it it before christmas morning.

Merry Christmas, you guys, and thanks for watching all my stuff despite the insanely long waits between each video. You rock.



EDIT: AND as usual, I forgot one credit! It's amazing how often I do this.
The "Clever girl" clip is from Jurassic Park.

Black Christmas (2006) is (C) Dimension Films

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Horrible Horror #20 - The Killer Eye (1999)

In our quest to cover some of the more infamous productions companies out there, we have finally reached Full Moon Entertainment - an odd company to be sure, with such astrange mix of utterly inane crap and some pretty damn fun and occasionally fairly creepy gothic horror flicks.

Today is not one of those, however. Today is the most ridicilously non-arousing sex romp you're ever gonna see. I welcome you to David Decoteau's THE KILLER EYE!

The Killer Eye is (C) Full Moon Entertainment

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Horrible Horror #19 - Mega Piranha (2010)

Well, as promised, I finally return after several setbacks to bring you more fun. In the spirit of last episode, we're focusing on a couple more production companies that keep spewing out crap - this time, The Asylum gets a jab as we take a look at the atrocity that is Mega Piranha.

Yeah, I count monster movies as horror most of the time, even if this doesn't always quite look like a straight out horror flick. That oughta change, however, when I take a look at Full Moon next time. I have a couple in mind, but you're more than welcome to suggest a Full Moon movie you'd like to see covered - who knows, you might be aware of one more horrible than what I have in mind.

With that said, just enjoy the video, guys!

Mega Piranha is (C) The Asylum Films

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Recently Seen Horror #10 - Fright Night 3D (2011)

Well, sorry for my long absence - next review is being worked on, but here's a quick review of the recent Fright Night remake to entertain you for a while.

SORRY about the very dark picture, I am still getting used to the webcam on my new laptop, and it seems to have a little trouble adjusting to what little light I have. Trying to figure out a way to make that look better.

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Horrible Horror - Q&A 2

Q&A time!

Just me adressing a few questions I get pretty often. Hope this clears a few things up and is somewhat interesting.

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My Top 9 Childhood Scares

Well, finally a new video out for all of you! This is a retrospect on my life, recounting thing sthat scared me as a child - and how fitting it is, considering it was my birthday last week! You'd almots think I plan these things out, huh?

This was never meant to be as ridicilously long as it got, but I did try to trim it down at least a little. It's not very jokey, but I hope you still find it entertaining.

On the other hand, it was CONSTANTLY fucking me right the hell over with all sorts of stupid snags in the editing process, so that's why it's a little late. But oh well!

(Rats! Once again, I forgot a credit! Well, I used a clip from Wes Craven's New Nightmare, along with a clip from Dumb and Dumber!!

Seriously. Can anyone invent a "forget-to-credit-means-getting-slapped" machine?)

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Recently Seen Horror #09 - Castle Freak (1995)

Finally doing one of these again, after watching a damn good little movie that I have absolutely no good excuse for not having watched before.

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Middle of Nowhere - Commentary

Why the hell not? Listen to me babble on about how much fun this was to do and tell you random, useless trivia!

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Middle of Nowhere - Bloopers!

Just for the hell of it - here's some bloopers for the movie! Believe me, there's a LOT more, but it's basically just inside jokes that are impossible to understand for anyone else. So have some fun with this instead and have fun watching me and my friends act like idiots.

- Stay Scared

My trip to Copenhell 2011

Alright everybody, I just HAVE to tell you about how awesome a trip I just had. I just spent two days at the EPIC danish Metal festival Copenhell along with my friends, and I got pictures to show all o' y'all!

Me and my friends all drove to the festival together after having spent the night at my parents' house, watching our own little premiere of my movie "Middle of Nowhere" - this is all of my pals on the festival site, enjoying our first beer of the trip - you'll probably recognize Michael (middle left) and Anders (middle right) from the movie - they played Poul and Laurits respetively.

Though I'm gonna be honest, the parking lot IS where we spent most of our time, drinking the beers we'd brought ourselves. It was our very own mini version of Heavy Metal Parking Lot, and it was awesome!



I don't have many pictures of the bands, and while these guys weren't the first we saw (that would be Artillery), KoRn was the one where we got in the front row and went crazy! Managed to get this fine picture of Jonathan!



And right after that, the motherfucking Priest took the scene! That man can rock some Metal Ballads! I couldn't get very close, but I didn't mind - I spent the concert sitting on a nearby hill with a full view of the stage and the entire festival - it was wonderful.



For some reason, there was a Wicker Man near the stage. I don't think they ever burned it since it rained on occasion, but it was pretty neat to see.


Sadly, my camera pretty much died on the second day, so I only have very few pictures. But those I have are awesome. On this day, we watched a bit of Anvil, along with going to a concert by fantastic up and coming danish Viking metal band "Vanir" whom I strongly recommend - brutal stuff! They even handed out mead to the audience!

But after that came my favorite moment. The place had a theater. That night, they were showing the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre.



Guess who this gentleman is?
That's right, that's me with Gunnar "Leatherface" Hansen. I didn't get to talk to him that much, but just seeing him, talking to him, getting this picture and hearing him introduce the movie was fantastic. Besides, he didn't have time to talk to me - he was too busy hanging out with Anvil!



So much brutal in one place.


But yeah, that little meeting and the entire festival has left me with what is now my most treasured belonging: THIS!



I'd call this festival a success - how about you guys?


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Middle of Nowhere

Well, everybody, here it is - my very first short film! That's right, I finally got around to try my hand at scriptwriting, directing and editing a 20-minute short slasher film, and it was an incredibly fun experience both for me and for all of my very good friends who decided to participate in this! It is full of beginner's mistakes that I can see NOW, but nonetheless, I am proud to have started and finished a project of some magnitude. You need to keep in mind that this an independent, first-time, no-budget production. Everyone involved are friends of mine who wanted to help, and the only one who has any acting experience at ALL is me (and I play the killer because of my height) - in fact, none of us have done ANYTHING related to filmmaking before. The camera is an old video camera, we didn't have a microphone, the budget was paid collectively, etc. So it's nothing big or flashy, but it is OUR project, and I am proud of it.

I want to thank everyone over at the wonderful site IndyMogul, for showing me that this would be possible, and the community there for giving some good advice - you can check the place and their awesome indie filmmaking shows out right here: http://www.indymogul.com

I hope you enjoy watching this as much as I enjoyed making it.

Remember, you can always send me suggestions for videos at Eshbaalauthr@gmail.com

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I'm finally back!

Yep, finally returned!

My house is on fire, brb

Juuust a quick update on some shocking news!

Horrible Horror #18 - Chopper Chicks in Zombietown (1989)

Holy crap, I actually made an episode.

As I explain in this video, I WAS supposed to do a review of the danish horror movie Kat, which I purposely left out of my rundown of danish horror films for that very reason - but it turns out I should have checked this out ahead of time, because goddamnit, I COULD NOT get my copy to work on this computer no matter what I do, at least not with subtitles. So we have another Devon's Ghost case here, people - maybe in two years, I'll get a chance to review Kat, huh?

It struck me as a bit of a surprise that I haven't reviewed anything by Troma before, but this is probably because I mostly think of Kaufman's own stuff when I think Troma, and I love most of that - and even then, I just admire Troma for dishing out whatever the hell they feel like. This is definetely bad and not as enjoyable as the others, but other than Class of Nuke Ém High 3, I actually don't recall seeing a Troma movie I couldn't stand (and even Nuke 'Em High 3 had it's so-bad-it's-good moments).

But anyway, here's the newest episode, Chopper Chicks in Zombietown! Hope you enjoy it!

EDIT: So I tried to fix the fact that the Howling II clip is completely black, and... I can't! For some reason, it just comes out black whenever I render the whole video. I have no idea how to fix this, guys - sorry. It really sucks to have a technical mistake like this. I'll try to find a way to work around it, but I am not counting on much luck.

Chopper Chicks in Zombietown (C) Chelsea Partners & Troma Entertainment

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Recently Seen Horror #08 - Scream 4 (2011)

Ghostface is back! But is he still worth watching?



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Middle of Nowhere - Trailer

Now, what could this be?

Check out the movie's FACEBOOK FAN PAGE!

Remember, you can always send me suggestions for videos at Eshbaalauthr@gmail.com

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History of Danish Horrror Movies

So, this video turned out to be a lot more than I thought it would be.

Originally, this was simply supposed to be a little Vlog, a la my "Slasher Collection" video, but I figured if I was gonna go here, I might as well try to cover as

much as I could as best I could - and that created the video you see right now. There's not much to say that I don't say in the video itself - I can only hope

you find it informative and entertaining.

All movies belong to their respective owners.

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Horrible Horror #17 - Devons Ghost (2005)

Well, here we are, guys!

This REALLY wasn't supposed to take as long as it ended up doing. In fact, some of you might even remember - this video is practically TWO YEARS LATE. Yes, this was originally supposed to be the second episode of the show, until I managed to lose my copy of the movie. For a LONG time, I could not find another copy, and when I finally did, I had planned too far ahead. But now I FINALLY got it done.

And you know what? I'm glad it ended up taking this long. Frankly, even if I would not go as far as to call myself great, I have gotten a LOT better at this stuff than I was, and half of this would have been a pain in the ass to do in Windows Movie Maker. And I like to think the whole thing got funnier thanks to a rewrite.

But here it finally is! Devon's Ghost. Enjoy. Or, rather... don't.

Devons Ghost is (C) Gag Order Films

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Horrible Horror #16 - Cubbyhouse (2001)

Hey, everybody, I am finally back!

This was so supposed to have been done ages ago, but I just kept running into obstacles. Moneytrouble that came out of nowhere, sprained
ankles, software that wouldn't work, files I couldn't find, shit that wouldn't render properly... it just kept piling up and getting delayed.
But here it is, finally - the worst haunted houes / demon possession flick I have come across so far - from Australia!!

On a different note, this is the first time I've edited with Sony Vegas. While that program is a godsend, I dunno if it is all that noticable,
simply because, well, my camera is still not very good - but I hope to get my hands on one in the near future.

I don't have much else to say this time around. Enjoy the show, and see you later!




Cubbyhouse is (C) David Hannay Productions

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Recently Seen Horror #07 - Buried (2010)

Just a little something to keep you entertained while I get the next review done. I really mean all I say in this one: It's hard to praise this movie enough.

I know the sound is a little shitty, but believe me, I spent like an hour trying to fix it, and it just... wouldn't. So sorry about that, but I hope you can bear it and enjoy the video.

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UPDATE: Where the hell did Esh go?

Just me giving a little heads-up to where I've been and that I am still alive and kicking.


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- Stay Scared